Welcome to Novamente's House of Snob (The Blog) My name is Gina and I am a self taught artist and also the owner of Novamente's shops on ebay.com & etsy.com. To visit Novamente's shops please use the tabs above to access either shop. House of Snob is just my little voice that's not always an indoor kinda voice on any and all things hilarious. Whether it is fashion, art, or just quirky it is important to always find humor in any and all things in existence. Novamente's House of Snob is not a trend whore type of establishment. I do not claim to own exclusively all things of the latest trends. H.O.S. preaches classics and quality over trends that die and die hard while at it. This casa is a place where the clothing commandments are in full effect and must be taken seriously at all times while you play here friends. If I see something ridiculous on any living human being, I reserve the right to put it on blast here in this house. Including my own scary hiccups in life, hah! Why "House of Snob?" you ask. Well, it started in high school probably. I developed a bit of a snobbery in which I could analyze and pick apart an appearance in about 2 minutes. I used to sit with a select few and we would do just this very thing. Some call it being a snob, some call it "people watching." As I've grown up a bit, I've had a few life changing events that have changed me drastically as a person, a friend, etc. I still LOVE to "people watch" but I've learned to bite my tongue a little more..... Kinda.
I am a tried and true thrift store junkie and a label snob I admit it. I believe in buying quality over quantity. That is primarily what Novamente retail on ebay is geared toward. Selling quality brand names and or designer apparel at a much friendlier price tag. Being a shoe collector you will also see many many things shoe related in my shops and on my blog. Please take a moment to check out the above "About Novamente" tab above as well for more information on art work and vintage everything. You can access most of Novamente's vintage love through our etsy.com shops. Please check back for frequent updates and announcements and of course subscribe to Novamente's blog. One post will be added minimum every week but not limited to one post a week either. Sometimes I just have more love to share one week and not so much the others.
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posted Jan 24, 2013, 9:59 AM by Georgina de la Garza Blanchat
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updated Jan 24, 2013, 10:54 AM
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This week's post is very simple. No matter what this week's goodness is ABSOLUTELY dedicated to https://www.facebook.com/scotta.blanchat hands down. He is not afraid to put on Grand Daddy's ANYTHING, and wear that crazy everywhere and anywhere his heart desires. He is not to mention, THEE BEST "Thrift Store Hunting Partner" on the entire planet. I don't even need to write a narrative or explanation really other than what is written here. I do not encourage people to purposely look like a silly fool with thrift items but, if you can rock your own "thang" then, you go with your bad self.... P.S. I could not find a clean version of this video and do not usually promote the use of such nasty language for the whole world to view, here in this house, anyway. Please ignore the language and watch because it is HILARIOUS yet, true!! Listen, absorb and apply friends!!! If You can't catch all the lyrics read below video for better understanding. My only dispute is his lashing out on designer items. I find TONS of designer items at Thrift stores. That is the secret to my success, but THANKS Macklemore & Ryan Lewis you're my new hero, TODAY. Thrift Shop by: Macklemore ft. Ryan Lewis & Wanz[Hook: Wanz] I'm gonna pop some tags, only got twenty dollars in my pocket I'm, I'm, I'm hunting, looking for a come up, this is f****** awesome
[Verse One: Macklemore] Walk into the club like what up? I got a big c*** I'm just pumped up off some s**t from the thrift shop Ice on the fringe is so damn frosty The people like "D**n, that's a cold a** honky" Rolling in hella deep, headed to the mezzanine Dressed in all pink except my gator shoes, those are green Draped in a leopard mink, girl standing next to me Probably shoulda washed this, smells like R.Kelly sheets, piss But ish, it was 99 cents, buy it, cop it and washing it 'Bout to go and get some compliments, passing up on those moccasins Someone else has been walking in, bummy and grudgy, f******* it I am stunting and plus it is saving money and I'm hella happy That's a bargain b****, I'mma take your grandpa style I'mma take your grandpa style, no for real, ask your grandpa Can I have his hand-me-downs? Velour jumpsuit and some house slippers Dookie Brown leather jacket that I found digging They had a broken keyboard, I bought a broken keyboard I bought a skeet blanket, then I bought a knee board Hello, hello, my ace man, my Miller John Wayne ain't got nothing on my fringe game, hell no I could take some Pro Wings, make them cool, sell those The sneaker heads would be like "Ah, he got the Velcros"
[Hook 2X]
[Verse Two: Macklemore] What you know about rocking a wolf on your noggin? What you knowing about wearing a fur fox skin? I'm digging, I'm digging, I'm searching right through that luggage One man's trash, that's another man's come up Thank your granddad for donating that fab button up shirt 'Cause right now, I'm up in here stunting I'm at the Goodwill, you can find me in the Uptons I'm that sucker, sucker searching in the section Your grammy, your aunty, your momma, your mammy I'll take those flannel zebra jammies, second hand and I'll rock that mother******* They built a onsie with the socks on the mother****** I hit the party and they stop in that mother***** They be like "Oh that Gucci, that's hella tight" I'm like "Yo, that's only fifty dollars for a t-shirt" Limited edition, let's do some simple addition Fifty dollars for a t-shirt, that's just some ignorant b**** s**** I call that getting swindled and pimped, **** I call that getting tricked by business, that shirt's hella dough And having the same one as six other people in this club is a hella don't Peep game, come take a look through my telescope Trying to get girls from a brand? Then you hella won't, then you hella won't
[Hook]
[Bridge: Wanz] I wear your granddad's clothes, I look incredible I'm in this big coat from that thrift shop down the road I wear your granddad's clothes, I look incredible I'm in this big coat from that thrift shop down the road
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posted Jan 18, 2013, 2:05 PM by Georgina de la Garza Blanchat
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updated Jan 18, 2013, 3:27 PM
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I read a suggestion in a book or story I’ve heard once before I think it was? The book, time, and place I heard this suggestion at or in is completely amiss to me now. The suggestion was to “turn over (in bed), close your eyes, and to return to a time or place where you were truly happy. Best to make it an ordinary one.” Those words ring loud in my head at night when I am either absolutely desperate for sleep or so distraught because it’s a struggle just to keep my eyes open. The time span that my eyes are actually open are sometimes a little melancholy because going that long of a spurt without human contact isn’t good for the heart, soul, body or mind. Feeling like you’re missing out on something in your very own life is not fun. People don’t always understand the auto-immune weirdos of the world. We look perfectly normal half the time but inside you’re on fire. I remember those words for different reasons pertaining to each sleep state I happen to be in at the time. But mostly to find that place “truly happy” that is. Do you know that place? Have you been there friends? It’s a nice place don’t you think? I think i’ve been there before?? The part “Best to make it an ordinary one” always makes me stop breathing for a few seconds. It scares me. You see friends, I your curly haired friend find that my happiest moments, whispers, affirmations, accomplishments, divulgence, adoration, confidants, suitors and it only continues tend to be found in the EXTRAORDINARY, at least for me. Is this normal? Don’t answer that. I am okay with abnormal. I’m okay with being anything BUT ordinary. I think?
When I get to that place where I am so desperate to jump into that familiar to all man-kind warm abyss called “sleep.” Or, when I arrive (late of course) at that place where I’d do anything to be able to have a substantial spurt of consciousness, or a few. I think of those words and search my heart, life, BRAIN full of the goings on in life. In hopes to either think of a happier thing other than being in a temporary coma or a vampire zombie where the next day your whole entire life seems to be throbbing like a balloon that’s in danger of popping. My sleep disturbances have gotten much better or as good as they are going to get though friends. This is NOT about my health or sleep. This is about the ever present little fear that I have because I can’t remember the last time I was happy in an ordinary moment. Nor can I remember last, that; careless kind of ecstatic that actually LASTS anyway. Don’t get ahead of yourselves and start coming to conclusions now. IT’S NOT a spiritual emptiness. I find all the joy and truth in that department that reigns over my world.
What I mean is that I can’t remember the the last time I felt that whole swift everlasting thrill or IF I have ever been HAPPY without the above. I thought maybe I was just meant to lead a dull “normal” life starting at when one is a “grown up” till....?? . That the few people that I’ve encountered that appear to have felt OVERWHELMING INSPIRATION or know what I am talking about were just finding happiness in worldly and materialistic things. Success and money because they’re workaholics or even worse they got exceptionally “lucky” and hit the big bucks some way whether through an inheritance or the lottery. Most of the time those people appear to be overflowing but they really just don’t get it. They don’t get hitting rock bottom I mean. They don’t understand having to crawl, then walk, and eventually run. Happiness is much more fulfilling in my opinion if you have to work or wait for it. I do know a few still that understand what I mean when I say “work hard” for that warm kind of drunk off of finding a big ol’ fix of merriment. I see them frustrated over what I am trying to convey as well. Scared to think that maybe settling for a bland life is in the works.
I am not “depressed” or “UNHAPPY.” Nothing just remains a consistent kind of force full of passionate intoxication that lasts for days, then weeks, and before you know it time just slips away from you. I am talking about any and all things here whether it be a job, place, or, person. Or new and old interests become sterile from lack of stimulation in one’s existence. I am talking about when you ask “What time is it?” because you want to stay right there in the place you are. You don’t want it to end but you know you have other responsibilities that tear you away from bliss. In opposition to asking “What time is it?” because it’s painfully monotonous in your shoes applicable to anything really in life and you are just trying to get through the minutes, hours, or a lifetime of BLAH staring at the clock. I feel more ordinary today than ever. I am content in a room full of silence which is healthy but I am not over-flowing. Artistic people don’t always thrive when NOT over flowing. I try to get to that place where it just runs over but either I don’t finish what I or someone else or thing starts or sometimes it’s because I am scared or intimidated. End result is I turn the other way and make haste all the way back to boring. Or there isn’t enough money, whatever the reasons there are too many of them. But mainly it’s because nothing seems the same in the world today as I think it ought to be. I never thought of myself as a romantic fanatic or impulsive buyer etc. I have always thought of myself as “practical” with practical expectations. Irrational when angered at times, but, then again who isn’t? As long as it’s NOT to the point where it veers into the “no return” zone, right?
I am not the type of girl one would call “punctual” at all times. It used to be because I usually was always so caught up and tunes in to my media or muse of the moment and time just went to the wayside. More recently it’s because I have had to learn how to say “No” or “I can’t right now” because my body is being unreliable TO ME at the moment. My heart is not unreliable. My love for my friends, family, animals, and interests remain consistent and dependable. The lame truth is that I have found myself growing more and more desolate and disappointed. It seems like all the safety nets in life have become undependable. The safety net I took for granted and always thought would NEVER cease in existence. That one your parents tell you that does not exist unless it’s them holding it and you think “I’ll show them it does in my life.” It’s sad that society your fellow peers and mine that we call friends just aren’t showing up anymore to help hold up the safety nets. The ones who say it’s okay to jump now Gina, I’ll catch you. In my circle there are a few that show up but just not ENOUGH to call my net stable enough for me to make that giant leap into. There’s so much instability, fickle fever, and self absorption, the ones who still show up are left dumb founded and in turn void of any inspiration or aspiration.
I see it everywhere. The handful whom I still hold dear and vice versa suffer the same dilemma. The disappointed and the self centered alike. The uninspired, the unloved, unworthy, unfaithful, unreliable, the unstable or they feel like it anyway. I’ve watched relationships, hopes, and dreams simply unravel and because of SUCH SELFISHNESS, defeat, lack of nourishment to the mind body and soul. Failure to thrive really. People just plain don’t see themselves as any of these things anymore because they don’t have to. You can BUY everything now, replace it with the next best thing, or somebody who loves you for G-d only knows why has simply settled for CRAP. I see the people I love continue to stand by the place, thing, or person that fails to appreciate their worth because it feels like there is nothing left that feels or IS any better . When did we become so blase’ about throwing the word “love” around so easily or not using it enough or at all? When did we become so blase’ about walking away from the ones we are supposed to stand by uplift infinitely or things we belong to that make a difference. When did we become so blase’ about hating people because they are different, on the fringe, or simply a flawed HUMAN? Get some botox, and a tummy tuck and then maybe “they” will stop hating me and then I can stop hating myself. It’s insane how people are always searching for the next best thing or person. When did we become so disposable to each other now? When did talent and purpose become so disposable?
People get away with treating others terribly now in the workplace, in the grocery store, in church, in marriages, all over because others have simply resigned to ALLOWING them to do it. “Settling” is what I call it. People have resigned themselves to boring meaningless lives because that’s what pays the bills, looks good, or came along and so what the hell right? I guess I am the odd girl out. I embrace indifference though friends. I have no idea what ordinary is supposed to be or if I belong there or not? I can say i am scared of ordinary because what if I can’t feel inspiration, meaning, love, G-d, or faith there at that place and status or ordinary? What if it will make me all of the vile things I feel like people, places, relationships, organizations, entire countries, have become? I am hardly innocent. I am guilty of many things. What I do have though friends is self awareness, faith, and a fear that drives me to be anything but ordinary if that means having to settle. I am a product of one of the greatest Romances in my opinion ever existed on this planet. My Grandparents have probably the greatest love story I have witnessed while alive so far. It was a quiet existence but far from ORDINARY. To me at least. Their lives and love for each other has impacted me so much that it gives me the courage to be anything BUT ordinary or to ever settle no matter what the price may be.
My Grandparents had a love so inspirational to see it literally gives you goosebumps to hear about and to actually witness for the years they were alive? Well, all I can say is that it is one of the greatest gifts ever given to me in my lifetime and will continue to be PERMANENTLY. They were modest folks who worked their way up and turned their teeny tiny 3 room home into the space I live in now. My Grandfather was a conductor for the railroad which is why I live so close to the border of where the wrong and right sides of the track meet. side Note: I live on the RIGHT side still. They Added on to their home literally THEMSELVES one room at a time when finances permitted. My grandmother never worked but she babysat for ALL the neighborhood children and saved every penny to be able to buy what she wanted to furnish the house they worked so hard for. Happiness lives here because it was hard earned and persevered through struggles, tragic death, addiction etc. in their very own lives and children’s lives because they never gave up on each other or lost sight of the things they were good at and loved.
My Grandparents were the type of people that were fiercely passionate about their interests separate from their marriage. Whether that be fishing, fashion, entertaining friends, camping, smoking, eating, cooking, WHATEVER they both allowed each other to pursue interests that defined them as individuals and allowed each other to have an identity, a purpose, a TALENT, outside of their marriage all the while bringing strength to the inside of their marriage and 6 children. They were simple and trustworthy people but far from ordinary. Consistent, brave, realistic, loyal and stopped looking for the next best thing when they looked at each other while exchanging marriage vows at the altar. They knew what they were and what they were not and never tried to stop bettering themselves individually up until both of their deaths. Flawed, imperfect, different, fat, in sickness and all, I can absolutely without a doubt say that my Grandfather was head over heels in love with my Grandmother until the very last breath he took. Remember those goosebumps I told you about? When he was on his death bed literally, on the day he died, somebody made mention of my Grandmother’s name while he was slipping away slowly, he opened his eyes briefly, took his last breath and died with goosebumps all over. True story. That is EXTRAORDINARY. They set the bar awfully high for this Pint Sized Terrorist.
With the new Year that rolled around I had quite a few people ask me what my resolution was for 2013. I always resolve to stop dropping the “f bomb” every year and it usually doesn’t work. I TRY THOUGH! Yes I am the person who says a lot of bad words even at church sometimes accidentally. Whatever, at least my bad habit is not smoking crack friends. It could be worse. My real resolution though this year is to find my place in the ordinary world even if that means I am only ordinary while at work or doing laundry. I also resolve to stick to my guns and NEVER to settle no matter how many people suck in the world. I resolve to help somebody move this year. when was the last time you helped a “friend” move to a new home friends? I am ashamed to admit that I can’t remember the last time I voluntarily helped somebody move, which is sad. I resolve to stop focusing on how crappy, scary, and sucky the people are in the world today and to focus on leading the life I was meant to live even if it means liviing on the fringe and different. I’d rather be different than ORDINARY. I’d rather be different in the sense that I am one of the rare ones that still has “old fashioned” or “unrealistic” morals and values in regards to the way I choose to live my life and raise a family if I ever do get to that place in my life. If that’s the plan written in the stars for me anyway.
I resolve to rekindle my artistic burn and create something amazing this year. I resolve to try to the best of my ability to remain what I call the old gas stove burner theory. You turn the knob and you hear the tick tick tick of the burner but no flame ever ignites. This happens because the person that is supposed to light the pilot has found that a different or “better” burner next door does not hesitate to ignite full force which always ends up burning the chicken in the end anyway. I won’t settle for anything that starts fires but is also impatient, judges this burner by it’s flameless-ness, and gives up when things are flawed. The match holder who is so blinded by the fire that they can’t see that Suzi hot stuff next door truly is the hot mess of the bunch. I will wait patiently for the things that will see, appreciate, and utilize my worth and talents. I won’t stop the tick tick ticking even if there isn’t a match to bring me to life. I’ll find a way to burn down the house anyway. I resolve to not only keep my tick alive no matter what, I will also if and when it’s my turn to light the fire will not be blinded by the fire next door myself.
I posted on my Facebook on New Year’s Eve that my resolution was best described by the words to a song that explains it all and inspired me when I really stopped to listen to the actual lyrics: “My Life, You ELECTRIFY my Life.” from the song Starlight written and performed by the band Muse. That is my goal. Not to settle for anything less than people, places, and things that electrify my life. I am done with negativity to the best of my ability. At the same time, I resolve to not be ordinary in the sense of treating people in my life as if they are disposable. I resolve to not walk away from things, places, or people just because one thing turns me off or scares me about them physically, emotionally, culturally, or geographically. Which is hard for me, this is still House of Snob after all. I won’t be shacking up with the Bloods, Crips, or any Psychopaths of the planet anytime soon though of course. Everything in wise moderation friends! I am ashamed to admit I learned that one the hard way. I resolve to be EXTRAORDINARY even if that means ending up in the last place I’d ever imagine leading an extraordinary life will ever take me.
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posted Jan 14, 2013, 8:41 PM by Georgina de la Garza Blanchat
It’s me friends. Do you remember my sometimes not so little voice still?? I know I have taken a HUGE hiatus from my weekly blog entries and I am apologizing right now, right here folks. Novamente’s page actually crashed for over a month so we had to get back in business and that took way too long it seems, to get it all back up and running. I am finally surrendering Novamente to the dreaded “Host G-ds.” It’s due time, after skating along so nicely host-free for so long let's be thankful but real at the same time, House of Snob deserves and needs to be a Host-ish kind of foundation finally . Don’t you agree? 'Course you do. We will bid farewell to any H.O.S. outage hiccups in the future, for the most part.
Most of you know that I have been researching a HUGE year long project that will eventually be posted on my blog when I am done with all correspondence. I plan on taking my writing to a bit of a serious note for a little while when the time comes for me to publish my project. Doesn’t mean Novamente will cease with clothing commandment goodness, just means we will be exploring the unknown as I have been doing since May. So, STAY TUNED. Till then, let’s educate the tragedies and judge some people’s No-No’s!
If you know Ms. Me (Gina) well, then you know that I am first and foremost ABOVE ALL a shoe fashionista extraordinaire and enthusiast. Novamente shops are your go to place for quality & designer shoes with a cost effective price tag.
SIDE NOTE......... House of Snob Clothing Commandment #4 million: "Thou shalt NEVER use the word "CHEAP" while accessing, commenting on, making reference to a NOVAMENTE or HOUSE of SNOB ANYTHING. Nor Shalt thy associate anything on thy own body as "CHEAP." Thou shalt implement the words "COST EFFECTIVE" or "INEXPENSIVE" in place of the dirty dirty profane term "CHEAP" from this day forward." *** We friends are NEVER "cheap" at Novamente or in our everyday lives away from This Heavenly House of Snob, period. Cheap is ghetto and as derogatory as any F or C four letter word in existence. When you discover a hidden treasure that's of good value with a lightweight price it is best to ALWAYS refer to your new little pot of gold as just that: "Inexpensive and of Good Value." If you use the C word,, you ARE the C word. Sorry Folks. On with the show!!
Since Novamente prides itself and ENJOYS providing pots of golden goodness in shoe form, it is of UTMOST importance that we educate all the shopping fabbies & flunkies of the world on the proper way golden goodness ought to look and fit on one's feet. Right friends? I'm always right friends. There's rarely a moment I'm wrong. Well, that might be a slight over exaggeration or bold faced lie, but, it is the truth in all things footwear related. YEZZUR. Being an avid collector of shoes myself since oh I don't know, BIRTH maybe, I would like to share with you the key elements to look for when trying on a pair of shoes you intend to purchase. Wise choices are thee UBER-IMPORTANTE when it comes to maintaining healthy hooves, pads, paws, "dogs", and/or lower leg extremeties. It is also beneficial to maintain the visual health for all of us in the I'll judge you by your terrible shoes realm of snobbery. In order to make a wise shoe purchase what is the #1 thing you should evaluate? FIT AND/OR COMFORT. Don't worry my fashion fluent friends, I know what I'm saying here when I place fit and comfort before style. You see style savvy folk place an emphasis on fabulous over fit, hands down. For all our friends whom are garb-challenged when it comes to your wardrobe and your appearance I know you place fit over fabulous. I am going to teach you to-up folk how to clean it up for the sake of all people who have to look at you and hear your voice when complaining about your aching feet or ugly feet ornaments. In other words I am going to attempt to teach you that fit and fabulous can go hand in hand with a few secrets aka: Common Sense. With that said Let's begin friends. PART 1
Fit Fact #1
This first pointer is going to be tough for all of you stank foot friends. What the little shoe guru man that used to measure your feet properly via Stride Rite -y- Buster Brown (with the cold metal foot sizers) won't tell you, because he no longer has a job, is, WAIT......!!! What the frock have you down with all the shoe man guru's DSW?? Anyway what the non existent shoe guru will not be able to tell you is that when you walk, stand, or run your feet expand a size or two. You may have heard this when buying a running shoe a time or two in your life perhaps? Well, it applies when you walk as well. So, if you are say. on your feet a lot on the job etc. that may be a major contributing factor to an uncomfortable shoe disaster. The best time (I hate to say it,) to have your feet properly measured is when your feet are a little sweaty, warm, and after you have been standing on them for a good while. That is why the ugly cheap yucks you call shoes that you bought at Wally world on a whim while picking up T.P. on your way home are SSSOOOO comfortable even if they're a disgusting disgrace let's refer to them as "Ug-Yucks". You bought them because your not as ug-yuck shoes (that you call cute, but are as close to SAS orthopedic shoes as one can get, minus laces flunkies) were purchased when your feet were just not ready for a try on session at Macy's. 
The ug-yucks you bought at Dollar Corral were put on your feet in a desperate comfort seeking act because you could no longer walk in the not so ug-yucks you call "darling." It's all you could do to relieve the massive blisters you've accumulated from an ill fit leading to future "corn on the cobb foot."
Please spare your loved ones the horror of Battle wound Galactica Cobb brushin' against your cringing honey's leg in the bed at night.. No-No Sheila-Jo!  
If you don't know who Sheila-Jo is see clothing commandments chapter 1 down below a few, and get with the program already. . The corn on the cobb dawgs has got me all off track now. Back to business. The best time to try on a pair of shoes, ANY SHOES, is when your feet are a little well, sweaty. Meaning if your feet are stank do not go to Nordstrom straight after a 2 hour workout at the gym because you now know the secrets of House of Snob's wisdom. Please wash your funk off even if it is in the sink via Bally's locker room. Throw on some flip flops let the feet breathe so the sales associates do not run the risk of syncope (aka: fainting spells) because they have to hold their breath while you browse the sale rack. Even better let's keep our favorite foot physician in business friends- Dr. scholl's. That does not mean you are allowed to buy any Dr. Scholl's footwear unless they are vintage Dr. scholl's flips. Okay so, Your now expanded to full size feet won't shrink much in the car on the drive over to Pay-less-ness just because you're sporting the flip flops. The same goes for you ladies that wear heels all day at work in a busy office etc. You are walking a lot just around the office etc. so your feet will do plenty of expanding while on the job.
Dr Kerry Zang of Arizona Footcare Physicians gives these recommendations courtesy their website:
http://www.walkingconnection.com/footcare1.htm#.UFGf4RzpeqU
The key to keeping your feet healthy and comfortable, regardless of the type of walking you will be doing or the type of shoe you will be wearing -- is wearing proper fitting shoes. When buying walking shoes, try on several different brands, styles and most importantly -- sizes. Your feet can expand as much as a 1/2 a size during the day, so shop for shoes in the midday or early evening when your feet are their largest. That will help protect them as they expand during your longer walks. Also, wearing the same type of socks while you shop that you wear when you walk, will help you in selecting the shoe that fits you the best. "
So you see flunky and fabbies? You should not have to compromise comfort because you are purchasing when you feet are not ready for it. I am not just talking nonsense, these are medical professionals recommending the same. with that said on to the next:
Fit Fact #2:
I would like to squash the stigma about pointy toed pumps and/or heels. All you fit(flunky) over fab. people want to avoid.
The pain you are only assuming pointed toe wonderful may appear to inflict is all a scam. All us fabs over flunky funks, know that there really is a pointed toe heaven out there. Our flunky friends just don't know how to get there so we have to show them fabbies! Did I say Flunky again? I meant Fit preferred. It's easy not to compromise style when you want to pair your cute new outfit (purchased at Novamente preferrebly) with a pair of pointed toed heels.
2A: Once your feet have been properly measured and you have corn on the cobb foot healed up and squared away, the secret all us pointed toed princesses know, is that when purchasing a pair of pointy toed heels, boots, or flats it is an absolute must to buy at least 1/2 to 1 whole size larger. This is why us Fabbies can walk around looking all fly in our pointy shoes while you cringe. If you buy your normal size you will surely get the squash toe sadness. When you purchase a shoe with a perfect point, THE POINT, is not to break your phalanges folks. You’ll get a hideousness comparable to lotus foot. Lotus Foot= Bound Feet China pre 1912 when it was banned FO EVA. That’s worse than Corn on The Cobb Folks. Bound feet are no laughing matter and neither is The Squash Toe Sadness.
2B: So how do you know when you apply 1/2 a size bigger or 1 whole size up? Well that would be dependent upon the heel. The higher the heel ofthe shoe, the more stress will be placed on your little piggies. So I always suggest when purchasing a pointed toe stilleto or high heeled boot, always purchase them one whole size larger than your normal size. You may think that this sounds preposterous but it is the golden goodness secret of the pointy toes plethora. If you are purchasing a flat with a pointed toe or a flat boot. Then it is probably only necessary to purchase 1/2 a size larger than your normal size. Your weight is evenly distributed but your foot hugs the ground resulting in “the spread” of foot fat. The half size is still a necessity.
Note: I heard some wanna be FASHIONISTO not nista but NISTO in line at Trader Joe’s telling some frumpy unibrow he was shopping with how "pointy toed pumps are so on the outs now" and so last season or some silly crap nonesense. I wanted to butt my nosey booty in and say “Nah-Uh. YOUS Dumb!" You obviously have not been screening Loubotin’s Fall/Winter 2012 collection. You sad tacky incorrect little man!” I said nothing. More pointy shoes for me, more dumbness for him. If you thought they were on the outs like Granola Glama-nisto, you are wrong. Pointy toed pleasantries are here to stay, for now.
Fabulous Fit Fact #3
Flip Flop Feet: Thou shalt Not wear thy flip flops or sandals with socks nor shall ye wear ill fitting flip flops so one’s soles or toes hang over either the front or back part of thy summer shoe. This applies to sandals as well people. Please apply this to wedge sandals as well. If your feet slide forward and your toes cover the rounded edge of the front of your shoe this means your favorite wedges do not fit! Give em the Ax if your toes are creeping up a little too far friends. Stat!
Properly fitting flips should leave adequate space for heel and toe
Cheap flip flops usually lack any kind of structure or support for the foot. If you can bend them in half -- like the one in the photo -- or twist them into a pretzel, they aren't going to help prevent foot fatigue.
A good flip flop bends only where you need it to bend when walking -- in the ball of the foot. "This minimal flexibility indicates the proper balance, arch support, and alignment for healthy feet," say Dr. Weil and Phil Vasyli.
To be Continued Tomorrow....FOR REAL THIS TIME
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posted Sep 19, 2012, 12:28 AM by Georgina de la Garza Blanchat
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updated Sep 20, 2012, 8:33 PM
]
Okay I’ll admit it. No House Of Snob Footwear Fit guide this week either. Sorry Friends. I am saying out loud in front of the whole entire planet my brain just will not produce any fancy footwear funnies this week. Before you roll your eyes, minimize, and resume your 1 on 1 with Perez Hilton time, wait and lemme explain first. I have a Heart Dr's Excuse. Keep Reading......
I’ve never really been the type of girl who shows up at work and says “Hey I’m just having a rough week emotionally, that’s why I am so listless and lame on the job lately. Can I go home? Take a personal day?.” However you wish to word it. It’s all the same kind of sickness. Sickness of the heart and soul correct? After an odd situation this week with a friend whom doesn’t know me that well, (thankfully it was on the phone) I realized that I better start leaving room for major emotional meltdowns in the workplace environment (MY HOME) and in my life period. If not, they tend to happen at odd moments, easily preventable by putting your life out there in a blog called House Of Snob on the internet or by just calling a friend who’s a good listener. Whichever you prefer.
I do also try VERY HARD not to use the word “I” very often in my blogs, not that it works, but I do honestly try friends. Since I try to be so vague in my blogs it just got me thinking about how vague I’ve become in life. When was the last time you got a phone call from Gina in which she was extremely hard to understand because she is trying to talk through crying hiccups and a nervous breakdown? Maybe a drunk dial of the sorts as of late? I’m pretty sure there is significantly less than a handful of people that can say that I have made one of those calls to them lately. Maybe even years. Not even a drunk text. Yeah, definitely years. I wasn’t so guarded once upon a time ago about matters of the heart I mean. I’d cry it out and carry on simple as that really. Happened a lot, those full of crying phone calls made to friends and family. The point I’m getting at is I don’t know who I’ve become. I don’t stop long enough in front of the mirror to even have a long moment to ask myself, “WHO IS THIS GINA?”
As I am closing a sad chapter of my life that I never wanted to end, in failure, it’s made me emotionally vulnerable and sneaky. I don’t like it. The sneaky part. Sure I put a snide or inspirational comment on Facebook here and there but nobody knows my life. I am so private that I have started hiding from my very own self. You see friends for me, it is easier to stay mad then to stop and face the music(sadness). It keeps me going. Anger is like emotional Red Bull it’ll keep you going when the going needs to go go go to keep the going's head above water. The Adrenaline rush from angst-y feelings always dies. It doesn’t fade slowly over time, at least not for me. It just suddenly stops at a weird moment that’s not appropriate for psycho emotional crack cocaine in a Red Bull can to stop working. Just when you think you’re good to go, it finds a weak spot and buh-bye mad front, hello sadness Hiroshima.
Handling my sadness has become so foreign to me, showing it even more so. I just don’t like folks knowing my business. All business mode emotionally is the product of some pretty good on the job training, don’t you agree? Don’t flinch an inch inside your "got it together suit", no no no. So, my emotional Red Bull was like Die Hard part 55 this week it just stopped working in the blink of an eye. The mad cold front I’d managed to lock into gear just melted in fast forward. This is my therapy people. I am putting my own no-no’s on blast for all the world to see. I am going to put my vulnerability on House of Snob’s tastefully set little dinner table and you friends, are going to have my emotions for supper. This is what I need to do to become a human again. Imperfect and real. No more of this "All Business" a second longer, because if not, I’m going to keep having these awkward moments in which the water works just start pouring rain in the middle of a random nowhere. Especially putting it on display for the last person on earth i’d want to see at that moment. What I hate most is when I feel sorry for myself. I’ve been working so hard at having WWWAAAAYYYY TOO much pride, I forgot how to feel.... Sorry for myself. On a happier note I am happy to report I am NOT a sociopath friends, I do have feelings, hooray. Rather than put all my tales into telling I am going to do a little therapeutic exercisio called “I am.....” I did this many many years ago during the dark ages via Myspace and it proved to be very informational to others in regards to about 75% of my psychotic-ness. It also felt good to just let go. That I do remember well. So with that said:
I am Gina.
I am new here ONCE AGAIN. I don’t know how to belong here, nor do I know how to even WANT to belong here again.
I am a Curly Haired Ninja. I’ve learned to become a quiet master of my emotional secrets. Today I am saying that even the most silent of Ninjas need an emotionally loud moment.
I am out of anger fuel. The adrenaline emo rush has stopped right on the train tracks of an oncoming train full of sad. My heart is gonna need a nap.
I am learning all about a new physical normal in my life. I DO have physical limitations after all that 20 something insomnia. It’s called Auto Immune Disease.
I have a sore throat and physical pain every day. I hate it, but, I’m going to learn to become it’s friend. I will not let sore throat & body pain stop me from living.
I am rebuilding a bridge with my Father that was never built on a very strong foundation to begin with. “What’s the name of the bridge?” you ask. It’s called "The Father/Daughter Relationship Bridge." It's right over the "Estranged For Too Long Sea" You know the one! Building it up real strong involves something almost impossible for me to fathom ever being able to touch. It’s called forgiveness.
I can’t come to the phone right now. I am real busy right now learning how to be in love with myself again. If you leave a message, I will get back to you as soon as I can. Buh-Bye. -click- That was my line hanging up even though you hung up long before the message had even begun.
I am letting go, and letting G-d, AGAIN.
I am and will always remain thee one and only Pint Sized Terrorist. No matter how much Red Bull Anger that has died flat, real hard.
I am a failure but am trying to look at what I feel I failed so miserably at, in a new light. Does it still make you a failure if you gave it all you got and then some more? I'm starting to think NOT SO MUCH.
I am learning to become a survivor once again, instead of a victim. I learned this not once, not twice, but this makes the third time now. Eventually it’s just like riding a bike. You never for get how.
I am walking away now. If it has to be that I walk away feeling mean, all that matters is that I walked away ALIVE.
I am not able to fit in my size 2 pants any longer ,but ,I’ll get there some how and soon. Not taking any arguments from you fat.
I am right back where I started.
I am officially retired from my work-a-holic-ness. I no longer work 3 jobs at once, nor two, but just one. If you even want to call it that. It’s more like 1/2 a job, when I can. I work in my PJ’s and it’s a position that I am still in training for.
I am feeling pretty deprived of a hero in human form lately. Wait, let me think back to who was at most times my numero uno knight/knightress in shining armor at one point in my life? Oh wait that’s right! I used to be my own #1 Super to the Gina’s life disasters Hero. I may be out late. I'm taking lessons on how to become my own personal hero again. Don’t wait up.
I am no longer hiding from my sadness. When I feel sad, I will do everything in my power to let mi corazon achieve the healing process like normal non-sociopathic people do. Even if I have to call a friend, ugly cry in front of a mohawk-haired tattooed almost stranger, to have a brownie a la mode fro-yo (watching calories) or to do what works the very best. Pray.
Now that i’ve taken a brief moment to have what a dear old friend of mine named Charlie always referred to as “the green apple quick step” of the heart, I feel much more human again. I hope when I look into the mirror I will recognize my own face again, only thinner hopefully maybe? Maybe that’s pushing it too soon, too quick. Thanks for reading friends. Thanks for not asking me to elaborate. Thanks for liking me and some of you even love me for the real me that I used to be and am learning to become once again. Does that even make sense? Thanks to the person who was at the receiving end of my emotional kaka that I took outta no where on you. It’s a rare thing, but not beautiful in any way to ugly cry, even over the phone. I hardly know you, but, you da best! For now. Don’t blow it! So friends, since I had my turn with the “I AM” share stick, it’s your turn now. For me, it’s night night time and also time for the little blue submarine shaped angels to come that kiss me good night named Tylenol PM. Could be time for your own angel to come and kiss you, even though yours may be named something different. Could be that It’s Xanee the angel time for all you loose cannons out there. Hugs not drugs. Just sayin. See? My cheap (not that you're the "c" word) therapy is working. This is the one and only time breaking the "c" word commandment is permissible. Almost back to the spicy me, I used to be. |
posted Sep 16, 2012, 2:45 PM by Georgina de la Garza Blanchat
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updated Sep 17, 2012, 3:14 PM
]
Hi friends. I have been SOOOOO insanely busy this week with everything and anything Panties related. Look for Novamente's new line of naughty and not so naughty underthings to be added to both shops very soon. While slacking on Novamennte's foot wear buying guide what I had originally planned for this week's post I was NOT shopping for jeans simultaneously AT ALL what so ever. NOPE, never, not me. While I wasn't shopping for jeans, I stumbled into this hilarious mom jean Slam. I have been feeling a little bit spicy and mean lately for posting my distaste for Emos & Screamos so openly. So, it felt good to find out that there are some fabulous sisters out there screamin' the same stuff I've been for years darlins! So, because I am so busy bringing to the public a whole lotta panties (that are the furthest thing from granny panties) I would like to redirect the mom jean love to this funny lady Miss Rachel's Blog in which she displays WITH PHOTOS the Old Navy Ban Clothing Commandment. I Love that I can bring to you readers, these clever and brave posts this little Miss Rachel has so kindly put so much time and BRILLIANCE into. She has already written about and photographed commandments I had planned to place on blast in the near future. Here in her posts in which I have posted links to, she says it so nicely, so unlike House of Snob's booty bashing. Made me feel just a little nicer for posting kindly this week via "Grasping for Objectivity." Thank you Miss Rachel for sharing the Mom Jean love and being my hero for this whole entire year. I have been searching far and wide for you. I knew you were out there.
P.S. Oh! Thanks for saving mi arse this week when I failed to deliver the shoe poo.
Grasping for Objectivity Mom Jean Info: hilarious!!
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posted Sep 9, 2012, 4:16 PM by Georgina de la Garza Blanchat
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updated Sep 9, 2012, 5:00 PM
]
This almost beautiful (NOT SO HOT YAY!) morning I was putzing around procrastinating on my overdue House of Snob Love and getting in work mode altogether. I have had only serious silencia of the brain lately, which, explains the crickets here at H.O.S. I have a part time room mate of sorts who has a grade school aged daughter named Hanna. My house, my dogs, and I are blessed with all things 8 going on 28 years old every other week Wednesday-Sunday. Chillin' with Hanna this morning was full of the average "Gina watch this" moments pretty much. This is a child who is pretty well behaved actually, but has old soul sorts of eyes. You know those kind? She is wise beyond her years, has this kind of sensitivity that still surprises me every time I see it coming from this child. I came out of my room a couple of days ago after not feeling so well for a few days. I shuffled into my sitting room and out of nowhere I hear this little voice ask "Gina, are you feeling better today?" I was super startled to see pretty little Hanna sitting on my sofa silent as a mouse, holding and petting my kitten Lola. It was so unlike a child to notice I hadn't been feeling good. I never mentioned it to her, nor did I appear to be sick. She just could tell. She knows me well as I do her. She is that child who watches, SEES, and HEARS every little thing. On occasion she will shout in her little voice "Gina, Language!" from the other room when I've dropped the "F" bomb while having an adult conversation in what i thought was out of earshot of this child.
Hanna has a better wardrobe than most grown folk I know my age. She is very mature for her age and is treated and referred to as a "young adult" away from her mother's home and care. Her other parent is financially comfortable x 10, and TRIES his hardest to be the best parent he can be. He is a single father and this is his only child who is a girl, obviously . He is an attentive, dedicated, hard working, parent actually. He definitely has "alternative" methods of parenting though. She prefers clothing that is not....??? Child like I guess. She comes over in her little Kate Spade flip flops, or Calvin Klein ballet flats. She wears little designer Joe's skinny jeans and pretty blouses. None of her clothing is revealing by any means of course though. That is not what I mean by un-child-like choices, it's just....?? Advanced accessorizing and outfit choice that I would consider wearing half her cute but modest little outfits myself. Hanna has an iphone for emergency purposes only of course (eye rolls). She often is taken on surprise trips to San Francisco, shopping sprees at Nordstrom Snottsdale, not the outlet here in T-town. Hanna does not act spoiled. She knows her "Bubba Joon" as she calls him (means "Dear Father" in Farsi,) is basically, money bags central. I'm pretty positive she knows she's privileged, but Hanna never looks down on any children whom may or may not be wearing an 800 dollar outfit similar to hers. She plays nicely with all children and she has a kind grateful heart. She says "Please and "Thank you" and still acts excited and appreciative each time Daddy Warbucks whips out his latest extravagance. She is a rare exception to the world of snobbery. She is genuinely a sweet girl who is OVERLY sensitive to ALL other human being's feelings, including adults.
Every time she stays with her mother (Hanna's parents share custody) Mom strips her of all her labels with the exception of her $350.00 watch and throws some children's place or Old Navy CHILDREN intended clothing on her. As soon as Hanna changes into her Mom's house duds, the old soul disappears for the day from her eyes and I see the 8 year old child she truly is and I am reminded that she is a REAL (little) GIRL. This morning she was exceptionally chatty and bubbly. She asked me if we (her and I) could do "Lemonade." I thought she meant making Lemonade, as in like a stand or something. I had no idea what to tell her. I didn't feel like "doing Lemonade" stand. I had an overdue blog to manage. I finally found out to my relief that "Lemonade" is a hand clap game. Hanna wanted to teach me her sassy hand clap game. So, of course I said "yes." It went something like this :
"Lemonade, Crunchy Ice. Blah Blah Blah.... This was new. I had never experienced the lemonade conundrum. Wasn't around when I was little. I didn't even know there were any other hand clap songs invented than what I was taught by my older sister, whom was taught by a much older cousin, whom was taught by her mother. After Hanna Banana taught me all about Lemonade, crunchy Ice, and throwing one's boyfriend to the ground, she asked me "Do you know any?" Hand clap sing song games that is. Well of course I do, kinda. I had to search my brain for about 5 minutes too long. Then came a flood of handclappy bliss. Visions of Miss Mary Mack, Candied apples, n' don't forget about Miss Susie and her infamous baby Tiny Tim. The crazy obscene songs like the chinese refrigerator game. You know, "Me Chinese me play joke me go p......" You know the outcome of your coke after chinese man gets ahold of it correct? So I started asking (or maybe assuming) if Hanna knew all the above. I started singing Miss Mary Mack for her. She just stood there blinking her pretty little eye lashes with a blank stare. Then, out of nowhere Hanna's face exploded into hysterical laughter. I stopped singing about Miss Mary's silver buttons, and looked at her cracking up and asked her "What?" In which Hanna replied "We don't know those ones, those are from THE OLDEN DAYS." I cringed at the olden days part. I distinctly remember asking my mom if she had this or that in the olden days when I was 8 as well. It's normal. Except, this is my first "Olden day" reference ever made by any single human being or child regarding my 30 years on this planet. I felt sooo "OLDEN."
I could not believe that Miss Mary Mack had not made it to the 21st century. At least not Hanna's upper crust school anyway. Why not? It got me thinking about ALL those little rhymes and songs and clapping of one little girl's hands onto another little pair. Who IS MISS MARY, and WHY is her last name MACK now ebonic for a heavy make out session? Who invented Miss Mary Mack, where does she come from? What about this Miss Susie, and her baby ? Why didn't CPS step in before Miss Susie the psycho put her sweet baby, Tiny Tim, into the bath-tub to see if he could swim???!! I mean seriously how is tiny Tim doing after he drank up all the water and ate up all the soap? How could a mother let her child attempt to eat a bathtub, thank goodness it wouldn't fit down his little throat. Who knew this Miss Susie and decided to write a song and make her drama a child's handclap game? So thus began my search into who are Miss Susie and Miss Mary Mack? Why did somebody make up a song and game about kissing boys behind a dirty magazine? Why haven't Mary and Susie made it into the 21st century. Why isn't sitting in a rocker eating Betty Crocker watching the clock go tick-tock, tick-tock banana rock an option for the young girls of America anymore?
The Mysterious Miss Mary Mack or is it Merrimac(k)? Who are you mary?
Wikipedia of course came up first in my search. This is what ol' wiki-wiki-wiki is spinning:
Mary MackFrom Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia "Mary Mack" is a clapping game played by children in English-speaking countries. It is known in various parts of the United States and in New Zealandand has been called "the most common hand-clapping game in the English-speaking world".[1] In the game, two children stand or sit opposite to each other, and clap hands in tune to a rhyming song. The same song is also used as a jumprope rhyme,[2] although rarely so according to one source.[3] Various versions of the song exist; a common version goes: - Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack
- All dressed in black, black, black
- With silver buttons, buttons, buttons
- All down her back, back, back.
- She asked her mother, mother, mother
- for fifty cents, cents, cents
- To see the elephant, elephant, elephant
- Jump over the fence, fence, fence.
- He [or she or it] jumped so high, high, high
- He reached the sky, sky, sky
- He never came back, back, back
- Till the 4th of July, ly, ly!
In some variations, Mary Mack asks her mother for fifteen cents rather than fifty.[4] These variations may represent an earlier version of the song. It changed because of the speed of the rhyme and the similarity of the spoken words "fifteen" and "fifty", and because there were few things one could buy with 15 cents in the later part of the 20th century.[citation needed] [edit]Possible originsThe first verse, without the repetition, is also a riddle with the answer "coffin".[5] Early mentions of the part about the elephant do not include the part about Mary Mack.[6][7] [edit]MerrimackThe origin of the name Mary Mack is obscure, and various theories have been proposed. According to one theory Mary Mack originally was Merrimac (an early ironclad that would have been black, with silver rivets) suggesting that the first verse refers to the Battle of Hampton Roads during the American Civil War.[citation needed]
Still does not answer the question WHO WROTE Miss Mary Mack's song?
Here's what I stumbled upon:
For a training session, I am trying to find out the origin of the
children's jump rope rhyme "Miss Mary Mack." Was there a real-life
Miss Mary Mack? Who was she? When did the rhyme originate? |
Subject: Re: origin "Miss Mary Mack"
Answered By: tutuzdad-ga on 25 Feb 2003 10:43 PST
| |
Dear nkalman-ga;
Thank you for allowing me an opportunity to answer your interesting
question.
Mary Ann Hoberman, of Greenwich, Connecticut, a prolific, critically
acclaimed, award winning author of children’s’ books, wrote the
nonsensical poem “Miss Mary Mack”. It became so popular that she
eventually elaborated in it and created an entire board book story
around the widely recognized rhyme.
The poem was first recorded and set to music by music educator and
children’s music performer, Ella Jenkins (nicknamed, “The First Lady
of Children’s Music”) in 1968.
Here are the lyrics:
“Miss Mary Mack”
Miss Mary Mack - Mack Mack
All dressed in black - black black
With silver buttons - buttons buttons
All down her back - back back
She asked her Mother - Mother Mother
For fifteen cents - cents cents
To see the elephants - elephants elephants
Jump the fence - fence fence
They jumped so high - high high
They touched the sky - sky sky
And they never came back - back back
Til the forth of July - ly ly
I hope this answers all of your questions about this wonderful song.
Thank you for bringing your question to us.
Best regards;
Tutuzdad-ga
INFORMATION SOURCES
THE NATIONAL BOOK FOUNDATION
http://www.nationalbook.org/famlit2002mhoberman.html
THE BOOKS – MISS MARY MACK BY MARY ANN HOBERMAN
http://www.twbookmark.com/books/50/0316931187/index.html
MARY ANN HOBERMAN (OFFICIAL SITE)
http://www.maryannhoberman.com
AUTHORS: MARY ANN HOBERMAN
http://www.twbookmark.com/authors/22/517/
BEST CHILDRENS MUCIS.COM
http://www.bestchildrensmusic.com/lyrc_dfc.htm
ELLA JENKINS
http://www.yellow-springs.k12.oh.us/ys-mls/ella_jenkins.htm
SEARCH STRATEGY
SEARCH ENGINE USED:
Google ://www.google.com
SEARCH TERMS USED:
“MISS MARY MACK”
“MARY ANN HOBERMAN”
"ELLA JENKINS" |
Gosh Miss Mary not the hussy I thought you were.... On to the next.
WHO ARE YOU MISS SUSIE, and WHY do you place babies in bath tubs to see if they can swim for fun?
Wiki-Wiki says:
Miss SusieFrom Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia "Miss Susie" (also "Miss Suzy", "Miss Lucy", "Miss Molly", "When Maxie", "Miss Mary", "Miss Cassima" or 'Helen') is the name of an Americanschoolyard rhyme and clapping game in which almost each verse leads up to a rude word or profanity which is elided into the next verse as part of an innocuous word or phrase. Sometimes various hand signs accompany the song, such as making a phone with one's hand at "hello operator." As with other clapping games, it is primarily practiced by pre-pubescent girls. It has also gained popularity in English primary schools known as When Maxie, as in When Maxie was a baby. [edit]StructureThe rhyme is arranged in couplets, with an A-B / C-B rhyme scheme. The rhyme is organized by its meter, which is in sprung rhythm with trimeter.[1]Accentual verse (including sprung rhythm) is a common form in English folk verse, including nursery rhymes and skipping-rope rhymes. The rhyme approaches taboo words, only to cut them off and modify them with an enjambment. It shares much of the same melody as "The Merry-Go-Round Broke Down" (best known as the opening theme song of Merrie Melodies cartoons).[2] [edit]HistoryThe rhyme has developed in many regional variations over an extended period, as is common for such rhymes.[3] The earliest known form is from the 1950s in Michigan, and consists of the four lines:[4] - Hellen had a steamboat, the steamboat had a bell.
- Hellen took some dynamite and blew the bell to Hell
- O operator, give me number nine,
- If it doesn’t answer, give me back my dime.
Later versions developed by embellishment, with other versions adding and removing stanzas including kissing, boys zipping up their flies, a little black boy, and bras, while the initial "... boat, ... bell / ..., ... Hell / -o ... number nine / If ..." has remained stable, though with variations in the details. [edit]Pop cultureThe rhyme is sometimes referenced in popular culture: - Bob Saget sings a similar song at the end of his live comedy act.
- In the White Stripes song "Hello Operator" (on the album De Stijl): "Hello operator / Can you give me number nine? / Can I see you later? / Can you give me back my dime?"
- In the Self song "Pattycake" (a reminiscence of the narrator's 1970s childhood, on the album Gizmodgery, which was performed using only children's toy instruments): Verses 2 through 4 and a modified version of verse 5 as a bridge.
- In The Simpsons episode Bart Sells His Soul, Sherri and Terri chant, "Bart sold his soul, and that's just swell / Now he's going straight to / Hello operator / give me number nine" in Bart's nightmare. And in Fat Man and Little Boy, Lisa and her friend Janey recite this rhyme. An eavesdroppingHomer gasps whenever he expects profanity and lets out sighs of relief when they turn out to be innocuous.
- On According to Jim in the episode The Bachelor Jim and Andy sing Miss Susie (omitting the first verse) while accompanying the song with the piano and the harmonica.
- In the episode "Something You Can Do with Your Finger" from the fourth season of South Park, Wendy Testaburger sings a parody song starting with "Ms. Landers".
- On Rocko's Modern Life, Rocko and Heffer Wolfe sing the first few bars of the song on a car trip.
- On Hey Arnold, the song was the center of the episode "Fishing Trip", and was also sung by Davy Jones, who appeared as himself in animated form in the same episode. (Version 3, below)
- Jibjab's 2008 Year in Review was set to the song and featured a similar lyrical concept, for instance "When the maverick tapped a hockey mom the press said, 'What the...' Truck bombs in Islamabad", etc.
- In the Emilie Autumn song "Miss Lucy Had Some Leeches," the concept of seemingly dark/profane phrases turning into innocuous words is taken further, although sung in the same style and tune as the original. Example lyric: "Miss Lucy had some leeches/ Her leeches liked to suck/ And when they drank up all her blood she didn't give a/ Funny when the doctors..."
1==Lyrics== Numerous versions exist, varying across time and regionally.[4] A sampling include the following: | Version 1 | Version 2 | Version 3 | Version 4 | Version 5 | Version 6 | Version 7 | Version 8 | Version 9 | Version 10 | Version 11 |
|---|
Miss Susie had a steamboat
The steamboat had a bell
(ding ding)
Miss Susie went to heaven
The steamboat went to... Hello operator
please give me number nine
And if you don't
I'll chop off your... Behind the frigerator
There was a piece of glass
Miss Susie fell upon it
And broke her little... Ask me no more questions
Tell me no more lies
The boys are in the bathroom
Zipping up their... Flies are in the meadow
The bees are in the park
Miss Susie and her boyfriend
Are kissing in the... D-A-R-K D-A-R-K dark dark dark Dark is like the ocean
Dark is like the sea
Dark is like the underwear
My boyfriend put on ME ME ME So I kicked him all through Paris
I kicked him all through France
I kicked him on the soccer field
Until he lost his PANTS PANTS PANTS
| Miss Susie had a steamboat
The steamboat had a bell
Miss Susie went to heaven
The steamboat went to... Hello operator
Please give me number nine
And if you disconnect me
I'll kick you from... Behind the frigerator
There was a piece of glass
Miss Susie fell upon it
And broke her little... Ask me no more questions
Tell me no more lies
Miss Susie told me all this
The day before she ... Dyed her hair all purple
Dyed her hair all green
Dyed her hair all purple,
And washed it down the stream
| Miss Susie had a tugboat
The tugboat had a bell
Miss Susie went to heaven
The tugboat went to... Hello operator
Please Give me number nine
And if you disconnect me
I'll kick you in the... Behind the frigerator
There was a piece of glass
Miss Susie fell upon it
And broke her big fat... Ask me no more questions
Tell me no more lies
The boys are in the bathroom
Zipping up their... Flies are the meadow
The bees are in the park
The boys and girls are kissing
Way past after dar-ar-ar-ar-ark!
| Miss Suzie had a steamboat
The steamboat had a bell
The steamboat went to Heaven
Miss Suzie went to... Hello operator
Please give me number 9
And if you disconnect me
I'll chop off your... Behind the fridgerator
There lay a piece of glass
Miss Suzie fell upon it
And it went straight up her... Ask me no more questions
Tell me no more lies
The boys are in the girlsroom
Pulling down their... Flies are in the meadow
The bees are in the park
Miss Suzie and her boyfriend
Are kissing in the... D-A-R-K D-A-R-K
D-A-R-K,
Dark is like a movie
A movie's like a show
A show is like a radio
And that is all... I know I know my Ma
I know I know my Pop
I know I know my sister
With the polka dotted bra.. (Brother)'s like a sister
My mom said not to tell,
She said I'll go to heaven
But he might go to... Hello operator
Please give me number ten
And if you disconnect me
I’ll sing this song again!
| Miss Suzie had a tugboat
The tugboat had a bell (ding ding)
Miss Suzie went to Heaven
The tugboat went to... Hello Operator
Please give me number nine
And if you disconnect me
I'll kick you right... Behind the fridgerator
There laid a piece of glass
Miss Suzie fell upon it
And broke her little... Ask me no more questions
Please tell me no more lies
Miss Suzie told me this
The day before she... Died her hair in purple
She died her hair in pink
She died her hair in polka dots
And washed it down the... Sink me in the ocean
Sink me in the sea
Sink me in the toilet
But please don't pee on me me me!
| Susie had a steamboat
The steamboat had a horn
(Toot, too)
Miss Susie went to heaven
The tugboat went to... Hello Operator
Give me number nine
And if you disconnect me
I'll chop of your... Behind the fridgerator
There was a piece of glass
Susie sat upon it
And broke her little... Ask me no more questions
Tell me no more lies
The boys are in the bathroom
Zipping up their... Flies are in the meadow
The bees are in the park
Miss Susie and her boyfriend
are kissing in the
D-A-R-K D-A-R-K... Dark, dark, dark
Darker than the ocean
Darker than the sea
Darker than the underwear my mommy puts on me My mommy is Godzilla
My daddy is King Kong
My brother is the stupid one who taught me this dumb song Oh, Operator
Give me number ten
And if you disconnect me
I'll sing this song again.
| Miss Susie had a steamboat
The steamboat had a bell
Miss Susie went to heaven
The steamboat went to HELLO operator
Give me number nine
If you disconnect me
I'll kick you in the BEHIND the refrigerator
There was a piece of glass
Miss Susie sat upon it
And broke her little ASK me no more questions
Tell me no more lies
The boys are in the girls' room
Zipping down their FLIES are in the meadow
Bees are in the park
Miss Susie's in the driveway,
Kissing in the
D-A-R-K D-A-R-K DARK!
| (from circa 1999)
Miss Suzie had a steamboat
The steamboat had a bell (toot toot)
Miss Suzie went to Heaven and the steamboat went to Hello operator
Get me number 9
And if you disconnect me
I'll chop off your Behind the fridgerator
There sat a piece of glass
Miss Suzie sat upon it
And broke her little Ask me no more questions
Tell me no more lies
The boys are in the bathrooom
Zipping up their Flies are in the meadow
The bees are in the park
Miss Suzie and her boyfriend
Are kissing in the D-A-R-K
D-A-R-K
Dark dark dark Is like a movie
A movie's like a show
A show is like a TV set
And that is all I know I know I know my ma
I know I know my pa
I know I know my sister
With the 80-acre bra My ma is godzilla
My pa is king kong
My sister is the silly one
Who doesn't know this song A song is like a rhythm
A rhythm's like a beat
A beet is like a vegetable
That you can really eat eat eat You eat with your silverware
Your silverware your silverware
You eat with your silverware
And not with your underwear!
| Miss Susie had a steamboat that steamboat had a bell Miss Susie went heaven that steamboat went to... Hello operator give me number 9 If you diconnect me I'll kick you from... Behind the 'fridgerator there was a piece of glass Miss Susie sat upon it and broke her little... Ask me no more questions tell me no more lies the boys are in the bedroom zipping down their... Flies are in the medow bees are in the park Miss Susie and her boyfriend are kissing in the D-A-R-K, D-A-R-K Dark, dark, dark darker than the ocean darker than the sea Darker than the black boys chasing after me I know I know my ma I know I know my pa I know I know my sister with her 40 acre bra
| Miss Susie had a steamboat
The steamboat had a bell (ding, ding)
Miss Susie went to Heaven
The steamboat went to...
Hello operator
Please give me number nine
And if you disconnect me
I'll kick you from...
Behind the ‘frigerator
There was a piece of glass
Miss Susie fell upon it
And broke her little...
Ask me no more questions
Tell me no more lies
The boys are in the bathroom
Zipping up their...
Flies are in the meadow
The bees are in the park
Miss Susie and her boyfriend
Are kissing in the
D-A-R-K, D-A-R-K, dark, dark, dark!
The dark is like the movies
The movies like a show
A show is like a video on HBO
I know, I know my ma
I know, I know my pa
I know, I know my sister with the forty acre bra
My mom gave me a nickel
My dad gave me a dime
My sister gave me her boyfriend
Who kissed me all the time
He kissed me over London
He kissed me over France
He kissed me over Disneyland
And lost his underpants
My mom took back the nickel
My dad took back the dime
My sister took back her boyfriend
And gave me Frankenstein
He made me do the dishes
He made me scrub the floor
He made me wash his underwear
I kicked him out the door
I kicked him over London
I kicked him over France
I kicked him over Disney
|
Okay, okay, I forgot Miss Susie had a steamboat before she had a baby she named Tiny Tim. So what's the scoop about Miss Susie circa child bearing years???? This little snippet about leeches and asylums (CAAA-REEEPY)) is about all I could dig up. No original author.... ,Hmmm Miss Lucy Goosey Susie Psycho you remain a mystery........ If you get a moment take a look at the list of other playground songs history. Some of them very scary stuff. I was never allowed to watch The Simpsons or South Park so, I wouldn't know what all the rest is about... Miss Susie is out there still I bet. I just think she A B C D E F G had plastic surgery and is in the witness protection program.
Miss Lucy Had A Baby / Miss Lucy Had A Steamboat (and variants)- An episode of The Simpsons has Lisa singing this while Homer listens in horror as he thinks she's going to swear, with a big sigh of relief whenever the rhyme is subverted.
- Emilie Autumn's variant "Miss Lucy Had Some Leeches" which is about the conditions of 1840's asylums set to the same tune and dosed up on Nightmare Fuel.
- Wendy sings one of the dirtier versions in South Park.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/PlaygroundSong This was a LOOONNNG time consuming investigation friends I can't believe how many different variations of the songs and hand clap games there are. Who knows where half of the silliness came from and who the original clever playground song writers are still remain kind of a mystery. Let's not forget "The Rythm of The Hot Dog" what exactly is the rhythm of the hot dog? This one I'm going to leave alone. I stand corrected however. ONE of my old Playground games that I am familiar with has made it all the way to Australia. Or, is it that it made it all the way to the U.S.?? Who knows?? Below Australia, are the tweenie somethings that I used above. These two were by far my favorites along with Australia. Look at little white girl miss thang work that neck. You go girl with yo bad self.
I learned the following BoBo Skee Watten Tatten Eh Eh Those Boys are Rotten. It makes MUCH more sense as BoBo Skee ROTTEN Totten! . That has to be the original. What does Bobo Skee Wotten Totten even mean? I have never been able to find out EVEN on the internet. Perhaps because it's nonsense and nonsense tends to have MANY MANY spelling variations. The girls below say Bobo see otten totten. I saw all variations in search results. This is what happens when speech impediments forever change the history and dynamics of a game passed on by youth throughout generations.
This is the EuroDisney of BoBoSki skee skee. The same, but oh so VERY different.
I could write about SO SO many others but my Miss Mary Miss Susie truth quest has got my head all cloudy and exhausted with all this talk about the lady and her alligator purse, and Tommy with his Itty Bitty Bike. He could be your Bobby and his itty bitty bike but he's forever going to be my Tommy on that little old bike. Tommy probably beat your Bobby up and stole his itty bitty bike. So I will end my fun journey with My favorite Candy Apple On A stick. Back in the day it made our TUMMIES go 246 but with all the cardiovascular disease nowadays, apparently, it caught up with folks' hearts and they're going 246 not the tummy. Poor people. First time I've ever heard this kind of thing. This is the closest variation of Candy Apple on a Stick that I learned as a child. Now it's "I like Candy on a stick." Dumb dumb dumb.
I hear these awful variations of these schoolyard clap and jump rope songs and it puts all the present day parents to shame. No offense. I thought it was a sad sad tragedy that little Hanna didn't know ANY of the good stuff. Good Stuff=Old School Stuff from the OLDEN DAYS. Not even her perfect wardrobe could make up for the lack there of Candy Apples on a Stick. Even with her Lemonade and crunchy ice moves. Is "Crunchy Ice" the same thing as what I call "The Good Ice?" You know, the good ice they serve at Eegees and inside Cherry Lime-ades at Sonic that's little and round resembling Trix cereal before they went all fruity shaped? Quick, if you have a kid go teach them one Olden Day hand clap game so we can pass Miss Mary and Miss Hussy Sue/Susie/Lucy Goosey on to the next generation. Despite all the conspiracy surrounding the Rhythm of The Hot Dog, The Outcome of Tiny Tim, and why in the world at the end of every schoolyard sing song children must "FREEZE"................................................................................................................................. That was me freezing right then, see? It's just what you do at the end, No questions about it. Friends, let's not 86 the tummies that go 246 to handclap heaven just yet because you lost the great tummy/heart debate in 3rd grade. Face it, Tummy won, now Freeze................ |
posted Aug 31, 2012, 12:53 AM by Georgina de la Garza Blanchat
[
updated Aug 31, 2012, 1:32 AM
]
Dear House of Snob Lovers, Novamente fans, and all To-Up Friends of the World,
Every good thing should have rules and regulations. Same goes for here at House of Snob. The Clothing & Personal appearance Commandments are ever changing meaning ANY one person can add a commandment at any given time, and, Put a No-No on blast with photographic proof if necessary. Novamente commandment Po-Po reserves the right to remove any commandment at any time, so, post comments wisely, add photos wisely, and, most of all be discreet with the photos. All faces in photos MUST be blacked out before posting. The following commandments shall be strictly enforced here at House of Snob and any of it's Novamente Mother-ship affiliates. Read & Apply. 
Brief history of how Commandment #1 came to be. I know this anonymous BBW (Big Beautiful Woman) she once told me something I will NEVER forget and I try to apply it at all times. Easier said than done. This woman is gorgeous *think Adele* with a flawless face. She always looks put together, smells nice, wears clothes that FIT and accentuate her best features. She knows how to buy and wear clothing according to her body type. She's very extraverted, bubbly, and a take charge kind of girl. She OOZES high self esteem and confidence that could go for miles and then some. I once told her I wished I could be as confident with my own body as she is with hers. I asked her how she managed to never criticize her body openly, or call herself "fat" like the rest of us ladies with significantly smaller builds always do in comparison. HOW and WHERE she got all her confidence I just did not know, but, aside from that I'll take some of whatever she's havin' please. This BBW looked me straight in the eye and blurted out the first commandment to ever go into effect right then and there at that very moment. This may just be the most important one to practice. She said to me: 
Commandment #1:" If Thou art lacking self assurance, thou shalt mislead thy neighbor.”
In BBW Leyman's term "If you don't have confidence ladies, FAKE IT." Some of the best advice I've ever received, true dat, true dat. Now there is such a thing as TOO MUCH confidence whether the OVERLY confident are fakin' it or not will probably forever remain a mystery. I have a funny feeling nobody down below is fakin' anything. You're supposed to Fake it TO MAKE IT! Not Fake it to BREAK IT!
#2 This is a repetitive offense “Thou shalt not wear a crop top so the underside of thy full term pregnant belly hangs out from underneath." Need I say more?
#3 I’m all about curves, everyone knows that. However please let’s keep them tucked away neatly “Thou shalt not wear such skinny jeans that one’s belly explodes over the top of them and is still fully visible through your tight screamo band T on.” They aren’t called SKINNY jeans for no apparent reason friends
  #4 “Thou shalt not mix thy metals or thy dark secondaries i.e. Brown and Black” Meaning no matter how trendy it may be don’t wear gold and silver jewelry together, stop creating ugly combo rings Helzberg! Please, no matter how fabulous you think you look, just don’t do it. It’s confusing and just an ugly drag. I don’t care how wonderful Gisele Bundchen looked wearing mixed metals in Vogue mag last month. WE friends, are NOT Gisele, period. It did not actually look THAT good no matter what you’ve convinced yourself of. It only looked good because you were too busy staring at her face! She’s a model, that is her job, to make things look good that us normies can’t. Black and Brown = Ugly No No. I try to stick to this formula to avoid catastrophes. Black and White go together sure, brown and white the same. I do not wear any two colors together that when mixed make the ugliest shade ever. The reason I call it a shade is because of it’s hideousness. It’s not even worthy of actually calling it a color. That leaves you a ton to work with on the color wheel so why do you have to mess with mixing these terrible when mixed two?! Black and white mixed makes a neutral gray, brown and white mixed makes a lovely shade of tan. Brown and Black mixed makes disgustingness. Again, it’s confusing and ugly. Moving on   #5 “Thou shalt not wear dirty white flip flops, or high heels.” Dirty white shoes only make one look as if they should have been named "Sheila-Jo" whom lives in a dumpy trailer park on the wrong side of the tracks. "Sheila Jo" wears any shade of eye shadow full brow that matches her terribly tacky purple acid wash jeans and her I heart Kittens half shirt that has a picture of a dirty white persian cat Lisa Frank style. "No-No Sheila Jo!" P.S. Yes this rule applies to Nana's dirty white house shoes she wears in public.... 
#6 is called “The Cheap Rule” Everyone owns a couple or twenty cheap shirts or tops I assume. I own some. Too Many Some people may own some cheap jeans or pants as well too of course. Whatever, money is tight these days I know this first hand. HOWEVER, there are plenty of thrift stores in any or most places relatively close by. You can find some AMAZING quality clothing that some Snottsdale Sorority Sister can not bear to look at in her closet anymore because it brings back just too many flash-backs of the awful night she threw up in it because she got so drunk when her boyfriend Jeremy told her he only wanted to be friends with benefits. Disgusting yeah maybe, but, that’s what G-d invented bleach for. No excuses there is even color safe bleach these days. Back to the cheap rule. “thou shalt not wear thy cheap top paired with thy cheap jeans.” It’s one or the other. If you opt for a cute *none the less* cheap top has to be paired with decent quality jeans THAT FIT and NO, OLD NAVY does not count, sorry folks, had to be said. If you wear cheapo walmart Faded Glory’s has to be paired with a KILLER quality top to distract the viewer from your tragic pants. If you pair cheap top with cheap jeans, and then you throw in the dirty white flip flops, mixed metals, then we’re headed toward “Sheila -Jo” again.
"Sheila Jo"
(Sheila Jo's man)"Chuck"
#7 My personal fave maybe & the #1 searched for item on ebay’s hot list. “Thou shalt stop ordering thy ‘Remy’ hair extensions from Ebay Overseas and trying to glue them in at home with thy glue gun.” Please Friends leave these sorts of disasters to all the Lindsey Lohan’s on the planet. Either high tail it to a PROFESSIONAL establishment NOT including your Mom’s friend Wanda’s kitchen who’s been doing “the whole enti-yuh ney-buh hoods fuh ye-uhs.” That is what cosmetologists are blessing our planet with, their hair extension craftiness. Raise your hand if you’re tired of seeing bad black and white skunk hair extensions that need brushing so often they have started to resemble dreadlocks. After all your attempts I promise you will never have that hair just like Ashlee Simpson’s. Just liberate yourselves already from the hot mess you call your “natural head of hair I swear.” If Britney can rock the high and tight so can you. She apparently got the memo, your turn.
  
#8 "Thou shalt not let thy child be obducted by the "TWEEMO" (Tween emo) occult" or even better " Friends don't let Friends morph themselves into something looking like vampire plus carnie gone bad aka: The emo movement." This one is gonna have to wait for a commentary. I need to sleep on this one. I just don't know where to begin. Do I even have to?? what is this?? I had to leave the eyes I broke my own rules, but, what is this? Is she a lion, a mouse or just a sad mess? It looks as if this child's mother just told him he has to stop slam dancing.......FOREVER. I don't think ANY of these children are Vitamin D deficient, do you? To Be Continued...................... |
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